SEX and PORNOGRAPHY addiction test

How can I tell if I'm getting addicted to sex or pornography?





Sinking boat. Photo copyrighted.If there's one lesson boys learn when growing up, it's the value of being tough, the value of winning.

The heroes of the big screen portray the ideal man as rough and rugged. James Bond never gives up. Neither did the characters played by John Wayne. And Rocky always won the big fight - or if he didn't win, he at least “goes the distance.” Those guys never gave up. And we don't want to give up either.

That resistance to raising the white flag serves men well during war or in a job situation that requires perseverance. It can help us hang in there when times are tough in a relationship. But when it comes to compulsive behavior, a refusal to give up only prolongs our agony. It leads to greater enslavement and harm.

Of course, most of us won't surrender until we know we're beaten or we know defeat is on the way. Maybe you're not convinced you even have a problem, or if you are, you're not sure how serious it is.
[Addictive Stages | Moment of truth]
How to Know If You're Hooked

Fishing hook. Photo copyrighted. It's important to understand that sexual addictions don't happen overnight. They take time to develop. But when they're full-blown, a man won't be able to resist the repeated urge to enter into a love relationship with a sexual object or experience that gives him pleasure and the illusion of intimacy.

That last sentence defines an addict:

1. He's hooked and can't say no.
2. The object of his addiction gives him two things: pleasure and an illusion of intimacy.

Not everyone who struggles with sexual compulsions is an addict. Some men abuse their sexuality for a period of time and then grow out of it. Many men with a regrettable sexual experience in the past put it behind them and move on.

But not everyone is so fortunate. Some men block emotional pain with sexual pleasure. Over time they have to try increasingly risky forms of sexual behavior in order to deaden the pain. Eventually their world revolves around sex. Their obsession has taken over their life.
The Sexual Addiction Test

Patrick Carnes suggests a series of four questions aimed at helping us discover if we have a sexual addiction and if so, how far it's progressed.[1] While asking yourself these questions, it's crucial that you are brutally honest. The first step in dealing with a problem is admitting we have one.
ONE - Is Your Behavior Secret?

Are you doing things you refuse to tell others about? Do you feel that if those closest to you knew what you were doing, they would reject you or strongly disapprove of your actions? Are you telling lies to cover your behavior? If so, you're isolating yourself from those you love and entering into a potentially addictive relationship with an object or event.
TWO - Is Your Behavior Abusive?

Does your sexual behavior create pain (emotional or physical) for you or others? Is it degrading or exploitative of others? Do you find yourself performing increasingly abusive acts? Do you derive pleasure from watching others being abused in some way?
THREE - Is Your Behavior Used to Deaden Painful Feelings?

Are your sexual actions an effort to change your mood rather than express affections? Do you masturbate or search for some other sexual outlet when you're depressed, bored, or angry? If your sexual behavior is used to erase pain, it's part of an addictive process.
FOUR - Is Your Behavior Empty of Genuine Commitment and Caring?

Are you substituting the illusion of intimacy provided by an object or event for the genuine intimacy found in a healthy relationship?

If you answered yes to even one of the four questions, your sexual behavior is either compulsive or addictive.
Addictive Stages

Photo Courtesy of Films for Christ. Copyrighted.While the four questions help determine if we have a problem, they don't tell us the extent of the problem. In order to determine that, we need to familiarize ourselves with the levels of addictions.[2]
Pre-addiction

Pre-addiction describes people who begin to find themselves sexually stimulated through impersonal objects, like pornography, or events, like strip clubs.

If you're at this level, your life is probably under control. You're holding down a job, and your relationship with your wife or girlfriend is intact. However, you realize that while your fascination with pornography, strip shows, or erotic talk lines isn't compulsive, it is dangerous. You may be troubled by the feeling that your slumbering lust could awaken and take over at any moment.
Level 1

At level 1 a man's lust has begun to exert its control. He's compulsively involved in such things as masturbation, pornography, homosexuality, or demeaning heterosexual relationships.

When a man reaches level 1, something significant has happened. While before he always struggled to keep his lust under control, now it's running wild. In his book The Addictive Personality, Craig Nakken notes that the single most important aspect of level 1 addictions is the emergence of the addictive personality.[3] A man's lust, like a great dragon, has awakened from its slumber and threatens to take over his life.

I experienced this the night I looked through my neighbor's window. It reminded me of the first time I got high on marijuana. I entered a new world and wanted to return to that world. There's something about that first high that people want to recreate. Similarly, a man who enters level 1 awakens his lust in a powerful way. And that initial experience is one he wants to recreate. When we enter level 1, the addictive part of our personality has been stirred. And make no mistake about it, the beast has an insatiable appetite that can slowly take over our life.
Level 2

When a man reaches level 2, he's taken a bigger and more dangerous step. Now his behavior involves victims and violations of the law. His activities include prostitution, exhibitionism, voyeurism, obscene phone calls, and touching a person intimately without consent. Most of the time he's considered more of a nuisance than a criminal, but unfortunately his behavior can inflict deep emotional pain on his victims.

Men who are exhibitionists or voyeurs will carry out their secret behavior for years. Living double lives, they're in constant fear of being caught.

All kinds of “good” people reach level 2. Hardly a week passes without a news story about a politician, teacher, or Hollywood star picking up a prostitute or making an unwanted sexual advance.
Level 3

By the time a man reaches level 3, his behavior involves serious crimes in which severe damage is done to the victim. Rape, incest, and child molestation occur at this level.
The Moment of Truth

Snake. Photo copyrighted.By now you should know if you're hooked. You should also have a feel for how far your sexual compulsion has progressed. While most of us would prefer avoiding the truth for as long as we can, eventually the moment of truth will arrive. Something will happen to force you to admit that your life is out of control.

* You'll accidentally leave a pornographic image on your computer monitor, and someone at work will report it to your boss.
* One of your kids will find your stash of X-rated videos.
* A policeman will arrive at your place of work because a neighbor has identified you as a Peeping Tom.
* Your wife will leave because you've had another affair.
* The school counselor will call because you've been reported to the child care agency for improperly touching a neighbor child.

For Samson, the moment of truth arrived near the end of his life. Blinded by lust, he slept in Delilah's lap while a Philistine barber cut his hair. A moment after the last strand fell, his enemies burst into his presence. Isolated from God, he was powerless to resist. Israel's champion became a bald-headed clown who entertained the Philistines.

Samson had fallen. He would never gaze at another Philistine woman. His enemies had made sure of that when they gouged out his eyes (Judges 16:20-21).

Many people believe that Samson's story ends on a tragic note. I don't. Although he was blind and imprisoned, his hair began to grow, and so did his relationship with God. The Lord forgave Samson and used him one last time. The hero of Judah pulled down a Philistine temple, destroying himself and his enemies.

Samson learned firsthand what every man must know. God is the God of a second and third and fourth chance. He never gives up on us.

Jesus Take the wheel

CARRIE UNDERWOOD LYRICS
"Jesus Take The Wheel"

She was driving last Friday on her way to Cincinnati
On a snow white Christmas Eve
Going home to see her Mama and her Daddy with the baby in the backseat
Fifty miles to go and she was running low on faith and gasoline
It'd been a long hard year
She had a lot on her mind and she didn't pay attention
she was going way too fast
Before she knew it she was spinning on a thin black sheet of glass
She saw both their lives flash before her eyes
She didn't even have time to cry
She was so scared
She threw her hands up in the air

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel

It was still getting colder when she made it to the shoulder
And the car came to a stop
She cried when she saw that baby in the backseat sleeping like a rock
And for the first time in a long time
She bowed her head to pray
She said I'm sorry for the way
I've been living my life
I know I've got to change
So from now on tonight

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
To save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel

Oh I'm letting go
So give me one more chance
Save me from this road I'm on
From this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel
Oh take it take it from me
Oh

Copyright 2011 by Rhainc
www. rhainconline.com, www.hephzy.blogspot.com Contact; +234-806-5976-701, +234-802-8439-207, +234-702-5014-460
Email: eazyraph@yahoo.com, eazyraph@gmail.com, eazyraph@facebook.com

Look What you've done for Tree 63 Lyrics

Look What You've Done
Tree63 Lyrics
Look what You've done for me
Your blood has set me free
Jesus my Lord
Look what You've done for me
I haven't been the same
Ever since that day I called Your name
Yahweh, Yahweh
Look what You've done for me

What can I do for You, my Lord?
I want You to know my heart is Yours
It's not a question of what You can do for me
But what can I do for You, my Lord?

Up to Your cross I crawled
Now I am standing ten feet tall
Jesus my Saviour
Look what You've done for me
I'm Free at last I'm free
I owe You my life completely
Yahweh, Yahweh
Look what You've done for me

What can I do for You, my Lord?
I want You to know my heart is Yours
It's not a question of what You can do for me
But what can I do for You, my Lord?












Copyright 2011 by Rhainc
www. rhainconline.com, www.hephzy.blogspot.com Contact; +234-806-5976-701, +234-802-8439-207, +234-702-5014-460
Email: eazyraph@yahoo.com, eazyraph@gmail.com, eazyraph@facebook.com

You are your Thoughts

As A Man Thinketh
I have so many titles for this article running through my head. "Stinking Thinking". "As A Man Thinketh In His Heart". "You Are What You Think". "So Go The Thoughts, So Go The Man". Let me start by asking you a few questions.
1. Are you totally discouraged right now?
2. Do you feel overwhelmed?
3. Is your mental thought process completely shut down?
4. Do you feel trapped?
I have a friend who consistently responds "I'm happy and blessed" when I ask him how he is doing. Now I like this guy, I really do. But, sometimes, I just want to say "get real" when he tells me that. I don't know, maybe he really is happy all the time. I guess it's possible. Anything is possible right?!
I'm going to get blasted over this article. I'm going to get tons of emails from the "Happy All The Time Crowd". They're going to tell me I've gone off the deep end. They will let me know that the Christian should always be happy. It's our right. It's our obligation. We should always have this enormous smile that tells everyone around us that we are HAPPY.
Christians are not allowed to get bummed out. Christians, especially Christian ministers are definitely not allowed to sink to the cloud of discouragement. A minister should never allow himself to get to a place of feeling down. Right?
Sounds good doesn't it. But in the real world that's a bunch of baloney. Just ask the old Prophet of God. One minute he's killing off 500 false prophets, and wishing he could die the next.
You might agree with me that most preachers are emotional people. Now some people out there are not real emotional, but most of the preachers I know are people who allow emotion to guide them. Now that's not a bad thing. I'm convinced that the Lord has a hard time using people who are hard to move emotionally. This is why he anointed David to be king when he was only a boy. God said of David, "He's after my heart". Other words, he's a person who is able to touch me with his emotion. Without emotion, David would be led of his own ideas and agenda. But, since he was a person whose heart could be touched, God said, "I'll use him in ways he never imagined he could be used."
Emotion is a good thing. We need to be emotional! God is emotional. Look what the scriptures tell us about him.
• He gets angry.
• He gets jealous.
• He laughs.
• He’s emotional!
We, being created in his image are allowed the same privilege of being emotional.
Am I making my point? It’s ok to be happy. It’s ok to be sad. It’s ok to be joyous. It’s ok to get mad, even angry. And for all of you who answered yes to my questions in the first paragraph, it’s ok to be totally discouraged. It’s ok to feel overwhelmed. And it’s ok to feel like you are trapped and boxed in with no way to get out of feeling completely bummed out.
Did you hear me? It’s OK to feel the way you feel right now. Anyone who says he/she has never felt the way you feel right now is a liar.
Examine the scriptures and you will find heroes of the faith who from time to time were depressed, down in the dumps, down in the mouth, dismal, disheartened, despondent, downcast, dismayed, dejected, doleful, disillusioned and disappointed. In other words they were just plain bummed.
They were bummed out over their circumstances. They were bummed out over their situation. They were bummed out over all the “stuff” that was happening in their life. They questioned whether God Loved them. They wondered if He cared. They doubted He was concerned. Even Jesus on the Cross said to the Father, “Why hast thou forsaken me”.
Are you hearing me, it’s ok to feel this way.
However.
As much as you may be relishing and enjoying living in misery, Sooner or later you are going to have to come out of your self entombed bed of misery. Hear me now, you cannot stay there. It’s a place we all visit from time to time, but it’s not where God would have you to live. I know you see no way out. I realize you are feeling numb even to His touch, but friend we have to move on.
The Psalmist 27:1,3 said “The Lord is the strength of my life… in this will I be confident.” When my strength is gone. When my inner encourager is discouraged. When I feel like I have there is no reason to press on, “The Lord Is My Strength.”
Jesus said, “As a man thinketh in his heart so is he”. Did you know that if your mental thought process is one of constant defeat, you will be defeated. If all you see is “no way out” then there will be no way out for you. You see a man’s life is what his thoughts make of it. If you allow yourself to waller in despair, you will never see the hope of a better day.
I am by nature an emotional person. I am easily motivated by emotion. Depending on my emotional health, I am either productive, energetic and encouraging. Or I am unproductive, exhausted, and critical of people. I can be the most happy confidence builder you ever met or I can be someone who is worried and sees little to hope for. It all depends on my emotional well being.
I realize that about myself. I admit it. I confess! So, what can I do to keep myself healthy emotionally? First, let me say that the Bible says much about the mind. EX: “The double minded man. Let this mind be in you.” Why does the Bible tell us to guard our mind? Because our minds control our emotions.
Did you hear that? What goes through your mind will dictate your emotions. If you allow negative thoughts to prevail, then your emotions will run rampant with negativity.
You’ve heard the story of the farmer who had two young bulls. He asked his helper which of the two bulls would grow to be the largest. The young man guessed the one who was the largest at that point. The farmer said “no, the one we feed the most.”
Can I say it’s time to start feeding your mind. Feed it with encouraging books. Feed it with a self growth seminar. Feed it with time in prayer. Feed it by allowing yourself to think outside the box. See yourself out of the situation you are in right now. Visualize the debt gone. Create in your mind a place where you can imagine all the trouble behind you. Envision a better day. Create it in your mind. Hope for it. See it. Believe God for it!
In Genesis 11, the Lord declared that a man would do whatsoever he imagined in his heart to do. There is nothing stopping you from being successful in your ministry, if you can imagine it and begin to believe God for it. Nothing can keep you from accomplishing your heart’s desire if you would only start to see it through the eyes of faith.
At this very minute, as you read this article, potential ideas are in your mind. By releasing and developing these ideas you can solve your financial problem, your business situation, you can care for yourself and your family, and attain success in your ministry. A steady inflow and practical use of creative thoughts can remake your live and you along with it.

Lets get to Work

Guy and Gals, this is a wake up call to all who have love for the future.
stand to your feet and take a long gaze into the future using these generation of youth as your goggles and you'll be shocked to know that the future has being stolen by the illicit acts of Immorality on the street of every town and city of the world.
presently we do not have positive dreams anymore, every young child wants to become a thief or sexist. hold on, I'll explain. in the mind of every child is the dream to be in a political office someday, not because they want to cause a change in the society but because they want they want to live large in the society and living large means being in control of both money and people. this can only be achieved by being corrupt and autocratic.

to read more log on next time


the ultimate challenge for change is to get on our knees for our generation

say a prayer today of not less than 60seconds and see God Change our Generation

JUMP INTO THE GREAT UNKNOWN

JUMP INTO THE GREAT UNKNOWN!

The lure of excitement
The hesitation of uncertainty
The curiosity that saves the cat
I pulled myself up – by the bootstraps, if you please
Gentle ripples on the surface of such a calm and still pool
The love plunge is made wholeheartedly into life’s pool
Basking in the glow
The pool’s astir
I am creating my reality

A jump into the great unknown
Trusting the ground would materialize under my feet or
Trusting I would develop wings and soar like the great eagle
It’s a step of faith
Angels on every side
Angels coming from different angles
Rich experiences catalogue my life
Victory is a certainty for I have faith in the process
Oh! The lure of excitement
The curiosity that saves the cat
You never know until you try
You never know until you step off
A jump into the great unknown
I live in Wonder-lure

What Could Be and What Should Be.

The Difference Between What Could Be and What Should Be.
Vision

Most people only see what could be. They say things like, "If our church did ___________ then it could be ____________." We spend way too much time talking about what could be. "Our church could be bigger. Our staff could be larger. Our congregants could be more giving, loving, caring" and the list goes on.

Could. It's almost a useless word (to me). How much of our energy is focused on what could be.

Should. Now there is a word that "Should" be in the churches vocabulary. When one has a vision for something, there is no Could. There is only Should. Could presents an Idea. Should casts a vision. Where Could presents an opinion, Should shows a way.

Should does not say "If" or "If only". Should says, "Let's do it. Let's find a way. Whatever it takes." Could sits on the sidelines and complains about what could be while Should carries the ball through obstacles and hurdles that most people would never consider approaching.

Should is passionate. Should is on fire. Should makes comfortable people uneasy. Should messes with the status queue. Should is Vision.

There is a significant difference between the outcome of Could and Should. When you begin to focus on Should, Could get's lost. Could cannot operate in the same realm as Should. When Should is in operation, Could grows silent.

Should is not what could be. Should is what must be. One man said "Give me liberty or give me death." Now there is Should. Could would say, we could have liberty if only this and that and you get the picture. Should however, say's there is no other option. There is no other recourse. No backup plan. Do or die. Liberty or death.

What Should be for your church in the coming New Year? Many churches are going to spend much time in planning session focusing on Could in the coming weeks. How many though will focus on Should. "We could do _________ this year, but we really Should do __________.
My prayer and hope for your ministry and church for the coming New Year is that Vision will ignite in your own heart and the hearts of those you minister to in a way that it never has before.